Eeyaaaaaghaaa!Eeyaaaaaghaaa! The frozen Furball screamed, Dean-like, as he popped at long last through one of the few open entrances to the Big Apples Jacob Javits Center for the LinuxWorld show. Limiting the number of accessible doors to the complex in lieu of beefed-up security must have seemed like a good idea at the time to some bean-counting event planner, but it just cried out "low budget" to His Hirsuteness. Spence quickly thawed out, thanks to heat from the catfight among vendors such as HP, Novell and Red Hat, which have all indemnified customers against any fallout from SCO lawsuits. The companies took cheap shots at one another, each claiming to offer the best legal umbrella. As one rival exec described HPs offering as a cheap marketing stunt, another company said Red Hats proposal wasnt worth the paper it was written on, while yet another vendor trashed Novells plan by saying "zero plus zero equals nothing." "I remember when LinuxWorld was a cozy community of eccentric enthusiasts," mused the Mouser. "Who let the suits in?"
Attempting to tune out IBMs irritating Orphan ads playing endlessly in the Javits chow area, the kibble-copping Kitty tuned in to a bigwig from a European Linux outfit that claimed Vienna, Austria, may soon take the open-source pledge. Inexplicably craving a sausage, the hungry Hairball cross-examined a domestic penguin peddler who said a major airlinewhose name he withheld, yet noted its corporate Song is familiar to someis also set to convert to Linux. The noshing name-dropper nyuk-nyukked when he heard IBM exec Jim Stallings lament that the companys next version of the DB2 database, code-named Stinger, will likely get a blander moniker. "We do some really cool code names, but we always end up calling it AS/400 or something," Stallings said.