1Don’t Let Crazy Help Desk Questions Cramp Your Summer Style
2If You Knew the Answer, Why Did You Ask?
3Have You Tried ‘Wi-Seven’?
4‘Wireless’ Just Means It Runs on Magic
End User: My mouse doesn’t work.
IT: You recently got a new one, is that right?
End User: Yes, and now it doesn’t work, so I need another new one.
IT: Did you check the batteries? Maybe they just need to be changed.
End User: It doesn’t have batteries.
IT: But isn’t it a wireless mouse?
End User: Right. So why would it use batteries?
IT: I’ll be right there.
5End User: My Monitor Is Broken
IT: OK. Can you tell more about what you’re experiencing?
End User: It turns on, but there’s nothing on the screen.
IT: Can you please confirm that the cable from the monitor to your computer is securely attached?
End User: I already did that; it’s connected.
IT: Does the settings menu pop up when you press one of the buttons off to the right of the screen?
End User: Yes.
IT: Try looking at the brightness setting. What is it set at?
End User: Oh. Never mind, it’s working now.
6Cup Holder Not Included
End User: Can you help fix my cup holder?
IT: Cup holder? We are a technical support desk for your servers and PCs.
End User: I know that! The cup holder I am having issues with is part of my PC.
IT: OK. Can you describe the issue to me?
End User: When I press the button that normally opens my cup holder, it doesn’t open. It just flashes a little green light at me and makes an odd grinding sound.
IT: Can you read what is written on the front of the cup holder tray that usually opens?
End User: Yes, it says DVD ROM. What does that mean?
7Pretty Sure That’s Not an Email Domain
8Don’t Get Your Wires Crossed
End User: Neither my mouse nor my keyboard is working.
IT: OK. I’m sorry. Before we bring new ones up, we just need to try to troubleshoot real quick. Can you please check to make sure they’re plugged into the back of your PC securely?
End User: Sure—one second. Oh. I think they’ll work now.
IT: Had they just come unplugged?
End User: Uh, no. They were plugged in.
IT: So, what did you find that appears to be the issue?
End User: Well, they were plugged in, but I guess I plugged them into the wrong place?
IT: The wrong place? There really should only be a couple of USB ports on the back.
End User: Yeah, they were plugged into USB ports, just not mine.
IT: Do you mean they were plugged into the workstation next to yours?
End User: Uh, yeah. I guess so.
IT: OK. Let’s insert the first disk.
End User: OK, done.
IT: At the prompt, press enter.
End User: It says it’s not found.
IT: OK, no problem. Let’s try the next disk
End User: It says “disk read error.”
IT: OK, we’ll try the next one.
End User: OK, but it’s a very tight fit, and I’m having a hard time closing the door.
End User: Should I be removing the other disks?
10Dark Side of the Monitor
End User: My Internet isn’t working.
IT: OK, when you open your browser, what happens?
End User: Nothing.
IT: Does the browser open? If so …
End User: No, it doesn’t open. In fact, there’s nothing on my screen.
IT: Okay, I understand. Is the monitor powered on?
End User: No. There’s nothing on the screen at all. I can’t even see the power button.
IT: It should be located on the bottom right side of the monitor and it looks …
End User: I know what it looks like, but it’s dark in here.
IT: It’s dark?
End User: Yes. All of the lights are off.
IT: Uh, is there currently power at your site?
End User: No. The power is out.
IT: I think that could be the problem.