1The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses
Written by Deb Perelman; Illustrated by Brian Moore
2The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Humming
Its not that your co-workers arent happy that your day is aloft with the sound of music, and your heart is filled with song—they are. But theyd still like you to keep it to yourself.
3The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Lingering Lunch Aromas
Dining al desko? Please, skip the garlic knots, tuna fish and curry; everyone in the cube farm doesnt want to smell it until happy hour.
4The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Telephone TMI
From heartbreaking conversations with your significant other, daily—But when you said it the way you just said it, I felt that you were being insensitive …—to muffled conversations with your mother/therapist/cat about how everyone
5The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Having Your Computer Volume On
The growth of video on the Internet? We think its fantastic. But play Borats Golden Globe acceptance speech on YouTube with the sound on, and prepare to feel some wrath from your fellow workers.
6The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Speakerphone Conversations
An excellent idea, really, if you are trying to make a large number of enemies in a minimal amount of time. For everyone else, were pretty sure youre not attending to other things in your vast and voluminous cube while on the phone, so pick up the recei
7The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Conversations with Co-workers Three Cubes Away
Hey Rico, did you get that TPS report? No, it should be on your desk. No, the second drawer! Oh, you wanted the other one? Thats not what I gave you? Check again because Im positive that…
8The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Musical Trails
Going somewhere, but leaving your cell phone—replete with its concert-volume Enter Sandman ring tone—on your desk …
9The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Bring Your Child to Work Day
Look, were all about showing your kids what you do, and inspiring them to do equally great things when they grow up. But its just one of those things that works out better for you, and everyone around you, if you have an office. With a door that closes.
10The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Spreading Your Germs
Coming into work sneezing, coughing and blowing your nose. Even worse is if you comment aloud: I hope Im not contagious.
11The Worst Cube-Dwelling Offenses – Narrating the World Around You
Peering into the cube next to yours and exclaiming aloud I love to read The Onion, too! And I didnt know we could use Google chat at work! is a sure-fire way to make some enemies.