Is Gateway Ted Imbibing Too Much Cow Juice?

“So, how much influence does that talking Holstein cow have on Gateway head honcho Ted Waitt?” mused the Mouser after hearing that the PC vendor is offering free digital music classes at its Gateway Country retail stores throughout the summer.

Spencer assumed the Svengali-like cow talked Ted into offering the free MP3 downloads available via Gateway.coms Music Zone, but could the bossy bovine have also devised the 3-hour, in-store, how-to classes on downloading music from the Internet and CD burning?

The classes instruct users to be mindful of copyright infringement while seeking music online, but, of course, if one were to fully believe the record industrys rhetoric that everyone and their grandmother is illegally downloading music, only about three or four people will be attending Gateways classes.

The companys new 300SE and 300X consumer PCs tout CD burners, so theres some method to the moo cows madness. But Spencer is puzzled by rumors that the highfalutin Holstein might have talked Ted into adding TVs to Gateways product line in the not-too-distant future.

A Furball friend who was laid off by WorldCom a couple of weeks ago told the Kitty that he and a bunch of other employees were notified of their fate by e-mail. The Tabby tattler claimed the workers were later called in to a conference room and told to turn over all their company IDs and card keys.

The tipster also told Spence that many people who got whacked were middle-management types who had been passed over for promotions and had a lot of seniority. The friend of the Furry One claimed a few of the luckier middle-management minions might have been offered buyouts a couple of days before the e-mail dismissals.

The Kitty was amused when he saw that the Portland (Ore.) Beavers, the Triple-A affiliate of the San Diego Padres, will sponsor an “Arthur Andersen Appreciation Night” to poke fun at the beleaguered accounting company. At its July 18 home game against Edmonton, the baseball team will grant anyone named “Arthur” or “Andersen” free admission. The first person who can prove his full name is Arthur Andersen will win a free party in one of the stadiums luxury suites.

According to the teams Web site, other attendees will have to pay $5 to enter but will get a $10 receipt for accounting purposes. Fans will be encouraged to bring old documents to be destroyed at “shredding stations” throughout the Beavers park.