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    A Mickey Mouse Operation

    By
    Spencer F. Katt
    -
    January 8, 2007
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      Sounds Goofy,” groused the Grimalkin when he heard that Disney.com was remolding itself as a social networking MySpace clone. “Thinking youll attract teens and tweens with branding that screams rodents and queens seems Wal-Mart-ishly misguided,” mused the Mouser. “Besides, kids always find sites with no parental controls, like Stickam.com, more amusing.”

      Suddenly, the KattPhones new ring tone, “Best of Both Worlds” by Hannah Montana, brought forth a call from a Texas-based tattler. The caller noted that John Medica, senior vice president of Dells product group, is leaving the company by this spring. Medica was a key player in helping Dell wrangle its rapid growth back in the mid-90s. The pal also pointed out that Don Carty, former head of American Airlines, has replaced James Schneider as CFO of Dell. The company has declined to comment on whether or not Schneiders resignation is related to the ongoing SEC probe into its accounting practices.

      Bidding the caller adieu, the Kitty checked out nerdsthemusical.com to get the deets on a new musical satire based on the rise to fame of Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. The show, debuting at the Philadelphia Theatre Company, will run from Jan. 25 to Feb. 25 and is hyped as a musical satire chronicling the parallel journeys of the Microsoft and Apple bigwigs paths to software glory. “Somebody should produce a musical about Oracle chief Larry Ellison,” laughed the Lynx. “Instead of “Rent,” it could be called “Acquire.”

      The American Songbook Preservation Society probably wouldnt be willing to produce a Larry-based musical production, though, thought Spence. Last month, the nonprofit foundation flew a plane with a banner in tow around Oracles Redwood Shores, Calif., headquarters seeking a charitable donation from Larry, to no avail. The group was hoping to entice Ellison to send a donation its way since the Oracle boss is required to dispense more than $100 million to charity to fulfill a 2005 settlement agreement with shareholders.

      “I wonder how Id fare in a vanity search on Jimmy Wales new Wikiasari search engine?” the Puss pondered, wondering how accurate a “user-driven” wiki-based search engine might be. “Im picturing grammar-school kids turning in reports detailing how the Klingons defeated Napoleon at the battle of Waterloo,” chuckled Le Chat.

      The Furry One then fielded a call from a Floridian friend who alerted him to the fact that a Miami-based company is developing GPS shoes. Quantum Satellite Technology plans to have the tracking shoes on shelves by March. The shoes, which feature a distress-signal button, will retail for about $350. “Im too paranoid to let my peds give away my whereabouts,” fretted the Furball. The friend also noted that the Dutch police have banned Segways from public roadways. According to Dutch law, the Segway is considered a moped, and its brake system, which works only by users leaning back, has been deemed unacceptable. “I wonder how the Dutch would view wooden GPS shoes?” cackled the Kitty.

      Dont forget me at go.eweek.com/kattoon

      Spill your guts at [email protected], or give the Katt a howl at 781-938-2627.

      Avatar
      Spencer F. Katt
      Spencer F. Katt, the Whiskered Wonder, has been the mascot and tipster extraordinaire for eWEEK and its predecessor print publication PC Week since 1984. The Gadabout Gatto makes the rounds of the high tech centers of the U.S. and beyond in search of news and gossip about the products, companies and people that keep the IT industry in top gear. By day he can often be found padding about the exhibit halls and briefing rooms searching for tips about the latest breakthrough products. By night he haunts the sushi bars and watering holes his ears alert to the merest whisper about a big round of venture capital funding or a blockbuster corporate buyout. The often tart-tongued tabby is always ready to share his own views about the inside stories behind the headlines. 

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