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    Black and White and Dead All Over

    By
    Spencer F. Katt
    -
    May 16, 2005
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      From: [email protected]

      Sent: Monday, May 16, 2005 12:05 AM

      To: eWEEK readers

      Subject: Red Hat investments; Idetiotic demo; hold that Tiger

      “So reds the new blue? Sounds like they Queer Eyed Longhorn,” snickered Spence when he heard about the Red Screen of Death that Microsoft may implement in future Windows. Microsoft blogger Michael Kaplan seemed like the Tom Ridge of technology last week when he posted pictures on his blog of a crimson variation on the Blue Screen of Death, which he said would indicate more serious errors than blue. “My PC is always at Orange alert,” cackled the Kitty.

      With Michael Dells $99.5 million personal investment in Red Hat software in mind, the Sultan of Sources hailed a cab for a rendezvous at Ole Scollay Squares Red Hat, a Beantown bar where he had been investing his personal dollars for years. As his cab rounded Bowdoin Street, the KattPhone vibrated wildly. An Islandia insider blurted that Computer Associates has given its Unicenter development leader, Frank Yang, his walking papers. The insider said Unicenter will join Fluke Networks to optimize the Interop Event Network.

      Spotting his source, Spence sidled up to the bar and ordered a pair of Guinness drafts. The loquacious liaison had just returned from an investment conference on mobile entertainment hosted by Pacific Crest Securities, where, she recounted, a small company called Idetic presented a service called MobiTV, which provides live TV to cell phones. Idetics co-founder and executive vice president of sales, Paul Scanlan, started his presentation with a prerequisite for any technology demo: His computer crashed. As Scanlan talked up the product with his back to the overhead projector, he failed to note that his now-rebooted computer was showing the contents of an e-mail from him to a co-worker. Pathetically, the note appeared to be fretting over a memory problem with the companys software and mentioned someone Scanlan called a “rat bastard,” whod apparently been making waves about the product. “I was embarrassed for the guy,” the source empathized.

      Changing the subject, Spence told his contact to check out a Google parody called Content Blocker at j-walk.com/other/googlecb/index.htm. The faux utility claims to block content and show only ads. “Speaking of online oddities,” she said, “did you hear that tech e-tailer TigerDirect.com is suing Apple over the use of the word Tiger for its new operating system? Now, Red Hat co-founder Robert Young, who owns a Canadian football team, the Hamilton Tiger-Cats, has offered to license Apple the teams use of Tiger to help in its defense.”

      Spence ordered another round and noted that Apple had enough legal battles lately to warrant its own Court TV miniseries. “Apple just settled out of court for an undisclosed sum with Eminem for using the rappers song Lose Yourself in an iTunes TV spot,” said the pal. “And the iPod makers ongoing dispute over trademark usage with the Beatles Apple Corp. is set to go to trial March 27, 2006.” “Goo goo gJobs,” chuckled the Fab Furball.

      Avatar
      Spencer F. Katt
      Spencer F. Katt, the Whiskered Wonder, has been the mascot and tipster extraordinaire for eWEEK and its predecessor print publication PC Week since 1984. The Gadabout Gatto makes the rounds of the high tech centers of the U.S. and beyond in search of news and gossip about the products, companies and people that keep the IT industry in top gear. By day he can often be found padding about the exhibit halls and briefing rooms searching for tips about the latest breakthrough products. By night he haunts the sushi bars and watering holes his ears alert to the merest whisper about a big round of venture capital funding or a blockbuster corporate buyout. The often tart-tongued tabby is always ready to share his own views about the inside stories behind the headlines. 

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